This is from a friend of mine, her kids are like my niece and nephew, and her sister was a great friend of mine, until someone took her life in a shooting. This blog was written by Brandi....im not goin to say her last name but this is a look into the eyes and soul of what these victims families could be going through.



I cant even put into words the heartbreak I feel for the families and friends who lost those close to them in the Virginia shootings. I do know that this will be one of the hardest, if not the hardest things to overcome. The shock is more like an earthquake of emotion. Those closest to the epicenter will suffer the most, and will take the longest to rebuild their lives. The shock hasn't even worn off, and probly won't for a long period of time. I'm about to open a door I don't go into depth about with too many people. For those who don't know, I lost my sister Britthney in the shooting here in Jonesboro on March 24, 1998. A sweet angelic child, we were as different as night and day. She was real small and petite, where I always skied over the other kids in my class. Her sweet face could get her out of trouble, and mine was the one who got us in trouble. She was content with whatever she could have, and I wasn't until I got what I wanted. Former teachers of mine usually dreaded the day they met my little sister, dreading she was like me. At the end of the year, they always told my mom that she was one of best students. There was 2 years difference between us, so we were close. March 24, 1998 started like any other day. We were both still tired when we got up, cause we stayed up so late the night before to watch the Oscars. Britthney was a big Leo fan, as well as a Titanic, and that was the big year for the movie. At one point, I even suggested staying home, but Britthney refused cause we skipped the day before. So off to school we went. At about 12:30pm, I went to choir, located in the music building, it set off from the High School. Five minutes into class, the intercom came on and ordered the teachers to lock all outside doors. That's when the curiousity set in, and the class became disrupted. In the window, I saw the 2 teachers running down to the football field to have the kids come in. For 15 minutes we waited anxiously, to see what was going on. In the window, students and me watched as a cop put on a bulletproof vest and got a rifle from the trunk of his cop car. He took off running toward the Middle School. Still confused as to what was happening, everyone thought a drug bust. It wasn't until we saw parents running down toward the Middle School and saw 7 ambulances pass by, that my choir teacher finally opened the door to find out was really happening. A lady that was walking towards the Middle School, passed by the music building, and told our teacher there was a shooting and some students have died. Our class then prayed, not to long after, I was called to the office. I wasn't worried about my sister, I just knew she was alright. It wasn't until I got to the office and realized that something was wrong. My mom's best friend, Deana, met me hurrying me out to the car. She was panicky and kept saying she's okay, she's okay. When I got in the car, I found my Mom in the backseat, with tears streaming down her face. Nothing had to be said, I knew she had been hurt. It seemed like eternity to get to the hospital, traffic was backed up for 2 miles, and somehow we managed to get around it all. We drove to Riceland foods to drop off my Uncle with my step-dad, then we headed to the hospital. When we arrived, we told them who we were looking for. They told us she's fine, she just got out of surgery, and that she was in recovery. I got excited all of the sudden, cause I just knew she was alright. They took us down to surgery, where they put us in a room with 2 nurses. I made a few phone calls to those who didn't know. In about 20 minutes, the Doctor came in and he said" As soon as she got here, we put her in surgery, I'm sorry but we couldn't save her." The feeling of those words were indescribable, all of the sudden I felt a sudden rush of heat overtake my body, I felt like I was suffocating. He asked if we wanted to see her, and my mom replied yes. We were escorted down the hall to where she laid lifeless on the bed. I fell to the floor, I could no longer breathe. My mom touched her hand and began to cry. We then were escorted down a hall where we met up with my step-dad, who knew nothing of my lil sis' condition. We all three were put in a room, waiting for the chaplin to arrive. It was only after the chaplin prayed with us, my stepdad realized she was dead. We then proceed to leave the hospital, meeting families of victims on the way out. It was outside of the ER I found out who the murderers were. Andrew Golden, 11, a boy she sat beside in science class, and had a crush on since she was younger, and Mitchell Johnson, 13. I was in total shock, and disbelief. How could two boys, that young, do something so horrible. My sister, barely 60 lbs walked out of two double doors for a routine fire drill into a spree of bullets that killed her. She along with 4 more, lost their lives that day. My sister never witnessed what most girls witness. She never went to prom with a high school sweetheart, she never drove a car, she didn't even get to experience the joy of make-up. She was robbed of all these things at the innocent age of 11. When I say reality don't set in till later, I mean it. The first few days afterwards, were a blur, I've never seen so many people. The media as well was desperate for their story, in fact, they followed my school bus out to my house. They called our house, they flew over our house, they were lined on the premises of the funeral home as well as the country road my sister is buried off of. When it all settled after the first week, intial reality took place, there wasn't as many people as the week before to keep your mind occupied. I tried to return to school a week later, and when 12:30 hit, my mind flooded with the last week occurences. Needless to say, I left and didn't return till later April. I felt alone, I just wanted to be around someone all the time. If it wasn't for my best friend Dilys, I wouldn't have survived. She stuck by me 24/7, I made her go everywhere with me. I made her sit on the commode and talk to me while I showered even. I knew if I was left alone I would have to face the fact she was gone. So many things that we did together came to a halt, like playing Barbies, riding our bicycles in the yard, watching 7th Heaven on Monday nights, those sort of things weren't the same by yourself or with anyone for that matter. I wouldn't sleep by myself, I slept in a pallet in my parent's room for 8 months, even when their waterbed flooded, and the carpet was pulled, I slept on the hardwood floor. Eventually, I broke down, and cried for myself. I, after months came to the realization that no matter how hard I prayed or cried out to God, I wasn't going to get my little sister back. That I would have to face that my little sidekick, was no longer part of my life. We weren't going to stay up late at night talking about crushes, or sneaking out, or what our weddings were going to be like, or even children. A part of me died with her that day, I lost my best friend.

This last March, Britthney has been dead for 9 years. Will I ever get over it? No, I've learned in the last 9 years to accept things for what they are. That's it and That's all. Everytime I hear of a tragedy to this nature, the scar that I carry reopens. I can feel for those who have been through such a horrible event, my heart goes out to them. The only advice I could share with those is, Your days, somehow get easier, you realize that because your world stops, doesn't mean the world around you does. So you have to learn to move with it. So what I'm hoping my tragedy instills in you as well as the Virginia Tech shootings, is your never promised tomorrow. So hug those close to you, Thank God for every breath you breathe, cause we are never promised another.

Thanks for posting that heartfelt story Amanda. It brought tears to my eyes. I live in Virginia and have an old friend who works at Tech. She is safe, thank God, but my heart goes out to those who lost loved ones. I lost my brother in an automobile accident when I was 13 so I understand how your friend felt losing her sister. In my case, it was over 40 years ago but you never forget how you felt when you got the news and those days and weeks that followed. It's hard to accept that life goes on around you but, eventually, you realize that you have to move on too.

Very poignant. Any one who has suddenly lost someone understands, to some degree, the above feelings.

Thanks for the post Amanda. I feel for your friend. Until out talk tonight I didn't know that you were at the middle school that day. You have been through so much and come out of it strong and wise. I've learned so much from you and respect you so much.

Luv ya girl. :glomp:

i think you misunderstood me, i wasnt at the middle school i was in the elementry, i just lost 3 friends in it sorry bout the confussion hw.

amanda - Thank you for posting that. The only way to describe what I'm feeling right now is to say that my heart hurts - literally feels like it's breaking.

Oh, okay. I'm easily confused. :)

I too feel for the parents of those killed for I had lost my first born to an accidental shooting. He had just turned 20 and was visiting his step brother at his apartment off campus. There had been shootings and fights at some college students housing off campus for a couple of weeks so when my son was shot...it was front page. Because the area is bad, many people have guns to protect themselves. My stepson's cousin had a gun there. It was supose to be empty when the cousin took it out and was showing my son. One shot was in the chamber and it went off shooting my son right thru his heart. It has been 11 years now and it always feels like yesterday. You do not know what a loss of a child can do til you face it. It has changed my life forever. Family members to this day do not understand how I could still talk to that step cousin let alone go to support him at his hearing. Like my priest said, its all in God's plan for us. It was his time... It has made my family very close and we live for each day that we have each other. God don't give you more than you can handle...learn from it and love one another.......so I pray for the healing of all family and friends and for the soul of the shooter...

I'm so sorry to hear this - but you are very forgiving it sounds like. I can't imagine anything worse than losing a child.

I agree that assigning blame and focusing on the horrors won't help anyone heal. Tragic things happen - the best we can do is to learn as much as we can from the experience and try to make the lives of those lost mean something. I have been really impressed by the brother of the child killed at Columbine. He said he had a choice - to be angry and bitter, or to use the light of his sister to help others and he is making it his life's work to help others deal with tragedy and come out in some kind of hopeful place.

For those who would like to support these families.

http://www.timesdispatch.com/servlet/Satel...s=1063629688048

Store flooded with T-shirt requests
Richmond Times-Dispatch
Thursday, April 19, 2007

Virginia Tech alumni and sympathizers swamped Disco Sports in western Henrico County this morning, eager to sign up for the store's customized "Hokie Nation" T-shirts.

By noon, at least 1,500 orders had been placed from around the country as the store began making T-shirts in advance of tomorrow's nationwide "Orange and Maroon Effect" day.

"I'm trying to get another shipment from next day air," said Kristen Held, a 1997 Tech graduate whose parents own the store.

Held said she had "no idea" exactly how many orders had been placed, but said her staff planned to work through the night to satisfy the growing demand for the shirt. She has pledged to donate profits from the $10 shirts to the university whenever it establishes a fund for the victims of Monday's shootings.

The only way to get on the waiting list, she said, is to come by the store at 1400 Starling Drive behind Regency Square in western Henrico County. Many orders will not be filled until early next week, she added.

Employees could not answer the phones this morning, and Held said her e-mail box was inundated with requests for the shirts from around the country.

The wife of a member of the Virginia Tech board of visitors was expected to pick up t-shirts for board members to wear in Blacksburg tomorrow.

-- Chip Jones

hey guys! this news are so sad, our country Peru feels the pain of all this families cause of PERUVIAN that was studying international relations in Virginia Tech died while he was in his french class.
His mom and sister are devasteded, his dad lives here in Lima, but he went over there as soon as he found out and as soon as he got the temporaly visa.
my prayers and thoughts are with all the victims families

I received a call from my 13 year old daughter this morning from school. She was in tears and begging me to come to the school and pick her up. I asked her what was wrong and my heart nearly stopped when I got the answer. A young girl had brought a gun to school along with a "hit list". I still don't have all the details so I can't be too clear on the accuracy, but my daughter said the principal made an announcement concerning the gun and list but told them to stay calm and go about their regular schedules, it had all been taken care of. I picked her up and the school was full of parents picking up their children. There was never any question of me picking her up. I even went to my other daughters school and picked her up, even though there was no threat made on her school. It's a sad time we are living in. Very sad and very scary.

Gesh. I just hope and pray that we don't have anyone that wants to "copy cat" this terrible loss!

I have been out and about today on a field trip with my daughter and was so impressed to see all that Hokie spirit from all.

yea my cousin asked to be picked up on tuesday due to 4 bomb threats I hate that people do this. I pray it doesnt happen again.